Strong Enough

Time and time I go back to my favorite bible verse, as many of you know I have 2 biological children, my son is special. I remember something my Grandma told me as I was discussing all his problems one day, she said “maybe you’re looking at this the wrong way, Gods not punishing you , He has simply said, You my child are strong enough to do this… here lately a song by Matthew West: Strong Enough has plagued me. The lyrics say: You must You must think I’m strong, to give me what I going through, well forgive me forgive me if I’m wrong but this looks like more than I can do ON MY OWN, I know I’m not strong enough to be everything I’m supposed to be I give up I’m not strong enough hands of mercy wont you cover me Lord right now I’m asking you to be strong enough for both of us…   it so continues. I find myself listening to more Christian music lately and digging for inspiration. My point is I feel overwhelmed. LIFE is hectic, 2 bio kids 2 steps a boyfriend with CRAZY hours, and taking 14 hours this semester. The semester hasn’t even really begun yet I feel overwhelmed. I find myself needing balance, a happy place. I find myself snapping about non important things. This saddens me.  Then there’s this guilt I’m currently feeling for even feeling like this, WHY: because I’m pretty dang fortunate, I don’t currently have to work to stay afloat yea I don’t have a lot of luxuries I’ve been use to. But I’m not as stressed as some people are. I have two wonderful babies that for whatever reason GOD saw fit to bless me with, I’m a sinner, yet I’ve received some of the greatest blessings on earth. My two little people make my quality of life SO MUCH BETTER. It’s the little moments of being a mom I am learning to cherish. I don’t deserve what I’ve been blessed with, yet I have it…and in my weak moments I can cry out I SIMPLY CANT DO THIS HELP ME FATHER and poof like magic He picks me up and carries me ok off my tangent.. Night